This week I'm sharing an excerpt from something new I am writing. This version of Jack and the Beanstalk is an adult fairy tale. I welcome any suggestions you may have as this is a work in progress.
Decadent Kane (Summer):
He walked and walked and walked until he came upon a peculiar looking man, wearing only bright red, bikini underwear. Jack had almost reached the point where the market was, but he was stopped to chat with the peculiar looking man.
“Good morning Jack. You’re a young, handsome lad,” the strange man greeted Jack.
“Good morning, sir.” Jack wondered how the man knew his name.
“And where might you be going with that fine cow?”
“I’m off to market to sell her,” Jack answered.
“Ah, but you must be a smart and cunning young, handsome man,” the strange man offered. “You look the intelligent sort to sell cows. Can you tell me how many beans make five?”
“Oh, sir, that is too easy. It is five. You have one bean in each hand, one in your mouth, one in the crack of your butt, and one in your crotch.”
“Oh, you are right. You are truly gifted and have smarts. You will go far, my handsome young man. The beans are magical. I dare say I would trade you my five magic beans for your cow.” There was twitch in the strange man’s crotch.
“But I would be a fool to trade Milky White for your beans.” Jack laughed a little. He was amused by the twitching under the man’s bikini. He liked the man, especially the way he was entertaining him but knew better than to trade his cow for just the beans.
“These aren’t ordinary beans. Like I said they are magical. You don’t know what these beans can do. If you plant them by nightfall, they will grow right up into the sky past the clouds, by morning.”
“Really? So you say?” Jack responded, in disbelief.
“It is the solid truth. If their magic doesn’t work, I’ll refund you your cow. You will become rich, and attract every man with your wit and looks.” There was more movement in the man’s crotch, enough to catch Jack’s eyes, since the man’s dick was moving.
“Oh, sir, that is indeed a very fine offer for Milky White. My poor mother will be very pleased.” Jack handed the tethered halter on Milky White to the peculiar man.
“Kiss me and you can have the first bean.” The strange man leaned toward Jack.
Jack leaned forward until the strange man’s lips, kissed his. Jack’s tongue explored the strange man’s mouth, until it curled around an odd shaped bean. He stepped away and placed his hand to his mouth. To Jack’s astonishment the bean was shaped like a small penis.
“Now find the one in the crack of my butt.” The strange man turned around. “I’ll warn you; I’m ticklish there.”